You or Me?

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The one I left behind

has blank eyes of amber brown

stares at a future of days unchanging

leans forward in the wheelchair

tries to stand on legs too weak and trembling

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The one I left behind

eats from another hand

like a baby bird

lives among others who wait

for something new or different

or death

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The one I left behind

left me behind

retreated into a place

mysterious, unreachable

Perhaps he’s on a divine mission

perhaps he’s dancing with angels

perhaps, in his eyes,

I’m the impaired one

lagging far behind.

Moon Meeting

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Moon Meeting

Yesterday morning, I met the moon in Walgreen’s.  She was looking for silver nail polish with glitter. 
“I lost my glasses,” she told me.

I helped her find a bottle called “Sheer Sparkle.”

She smelled like peppermint and lavender.  Her hair was long and white, bundled up in a messy bun.  She wore a baggy white t-shirt and wide leg jeans.

How did I know she was the moon?

She introduced herself, offering me her hand.  The nail polish on her fingernails was chipped.  Her nails were uneven and ragged.

“I am the moon,” she said.

I told her my name.

Her fingers felt cool and knobby, like an autumn branch.

“I’m in pretty good shape for 65,” she said, leaning forward to look in a mirror on the cosmetic counter.  She lifted the skin on her jawline and sighed.  “I’m beginning to sag a bit.”

Then she turned with a bright smile. “Would you have a buck or two for me?  I’m a little short today.  You know—waning.”

I paid for the nail polish.  She sailed up into the sky.

Joy

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Joy

“Then did I learn how existence could be cherish’d

 Strengthen’d and fed without the aid of joy.”

                                                                                                                            -Emily Bronte, Remembrance

Joy is not where I live

yet this life I hold like a damsel fly,

delicate, light-footed,

whose touch I thank each morning

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Joy is not what I speak,

but rituals, deeply rooted,

as the stream-fed cottonwood

affirm life’s leafy purpose

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Joy flies too high to grasp,

caught on an updraft, rising

on dappled, pointed wings

a lightness sought, inspired

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Joy is a bird rarely seen,

a fleeting lift of heart

while feet mark the dance

of a foreign time-signature

Where I’m From–Again

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I am from a no-God home with

a philosophical father

who lectured in ponderous tones

a mother who only liked Christmas

because her father was Italian.

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I am from a visit to an Italian hospital

where the winged blue nuns

sifted through peaceful sunbeams.

I am from 11 years old longing for that cloistered peace.

I am from a knowing there was more than

the right pleated skirt, the red ribbed sweater.

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I am from a meditating neighbor whose

tiny apartment hummed with a velvet love

that I coveted, and so learned the practice.

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I am from locking eyes with a living saint

whose gaze changed me forever.

Slight figure in orange robes, she opened

my first chakra and my heart.

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I am from chanting God’s names

with a thousand souls

the rising divine vibration of the universe.